Joshie
by PieceOfShit96
Summary: Adi's little cousin comes for a visit. But Otis has his work cut out for him as he tries to help the little boy heal from a traumatic event only he would understand.
1. Chapter 1

Adi sighed as the phone rang and she crawled off of Otis, who grunted discontentedly. As she stood, he rolled over and groped her ass, earning a laugh and an eye roll.

"Hello? Oh, hi!"

Otis pulled her closer as she talked, kissing her hips gently.

"We're so excited to see you guys!...Uh huh...Yeah? Ok...What?"

He understood now. Her aunt. They were coming to visit with Joshie.

"W...What? What happened?"

As her tone changed, he pulled away to look at her face, catching her just in time to see her turn sheet white.

"N...No...No..."

He lay still as the conversation ended and she sat down beside him on the bed. "What's wrong, mama?"

"Well...They're still coming. But something...Happened to Joshie."

"Oh no." He sat up. "What? What happened?"

"Well...They...went on a school camping trip...A-and...He had the 'privilege' of sleeping in the teacher's tent because he had been so good that week...And..."

"And what?"

"Otis...They think it's a good idea for you to talk to him..."

"Why? About what?"

"They know you'll understand. You...He needs to talk to someone who's been through what he has...That should help..."

"Adi what happ-" Realization dawned on Otis's face as he did the mental math. "Oh god...No...God no please don't tell me."

Adi nodded. "He's...So scared right now. He doesn't...Really understand. He just knows..."

"Oh god...Oh god no...Not him..."

"Otis..."

"I should have talked with him about this. I should have told him..."

"No, honey...No. That's not your job." She sighed. "They'll be here Wednesday...Think you can spend some time just you and him?"

"If he's not too scared, of course. "

She nodded. God she hoped he could help.

As Joshie got out of the car to greet them, she noticed a marked difference. He was drawn in on himself. Wearing an oversized sweater to protect him from the world, carrying his teddy bear.

Otis crouched down to receive him, opening his arms for a hug. Wordlessly, Joshie curled into him, burying himself in Otis's body. Otis slowly stood, cradling him and holding him close. "I know buddy. I know..." Otis kissed the boy's forehead and Adi balked, hoping he hadn't noticed.

"Come on. Let's go inside." She suggested, resting her hand on Otis's back and smiling sweetly at Joshie, who sheepishly smiled back.

Otis grunted. "You're getting too big for me to carry around, buddy." He stood Joshie beside him, reaching for his hand. Tears welled up in the little boy's eyes and he clamored for Otis desperately. "Ok, ok. Shh." He scooped Joshie into his arms around. "Don't cry. Don't cry. It's okay."

"He's been like this ever since..." His mother mourned. "He just...wants to be held all the time. And he can be fine and just start bawling and sobbing and I don't...I don't know what to do. He has horrible night terrors every night now. Wakes up screaming and crying."

"I know how that goes." She looked at Otis, currently, trying to calm Joshie, who was whimpering and shaking. He glared back. "I've been thrown out of bed many of times by a flailing husband."

"What do I do?"

Adi shrugged. "You just have to try and help them through it. Whatever they throw at you. They need you to know that you still love them. Even if they are scared. And even if they do catapult you out of bed at 3 am."

"Shhhh..." Otis soothed. Adi stood in awe. She had never seen him like this. Fatherly. Gentle. It made a part of her wish for children with him, seeing him with Joshie. It always had. But now it was more apparent. "I know buddy...It's okay."

Joshie whimpered and sniffled, finally calming himself.

"You look sleepy buddy. Are you tired?" Otis asked.

"Yeah..." He choked.

"Ok. How about you lay down for a nap then, huh? Come on. I'll get you set up in my bed alright?"

"Ok..."

The rest of the evening went on without much problem, except for a few moments where Joshie tugged on Otis's shirt and required soothing, but was relatively fine otherwise.

As Otis stumbled behind Adi into their bedroom that night, he grimaced, grabbing for his back. "Urgh...Kid's gettin' too big for that."

"You can tell him no, you know."

"No. I can't."

"Why?"

"Because I know exactly what he's going through. And I know what it's like to want that, ask for it, and get hit. I know what it's like to need something so simple that makes a world of difference, and you can't have it. I won't do that to him. He needs it right now, Adi. He's confused and scared and doesn't fully understand. I won't let him turn into me."

"Otis..."

"If I had had someone..." He sighed. "Nevermind."

"You're...You're so sweet and wonderful and Kind...I just wonder so much what you see when you look in the mirror." She wrapped her arms around him, kissing him.

"Mm..." He smirked. "How about a little more of that sugar, huh?"

"I think you worked for it today." She giggled.

It wasn't long until they were both naked, her kissing up and down his chest as he lie beneath her, growling and moaning in pleasure and appreciation at the sight before him.

"Do you want me, baby?" She purred.

"Nn...God, yes..." He answered, resting a hand on her back. "Always."

She straddled him, almost lowering herself onto him when she saw the presence beside them. "JOSHIE!"

"Don't hurt uncle Otis...Don't hurt him like that..."

"Holy fuckin' christ, kid..." Otis sighed, trying to get his heart to stop racing in his chest. "You scared the hell out of us."

"You're hurting him!"

"No, honey..." Adi looked desperately between the two of them, grappling for words.

"Look, buddy. I...I know it's hard to understand right now because of what you just went through...But when...You're with the right person and they do things LIKE that to you, and you WANT them to do it to you and you ASK them, it feels really, really good. Now...Adi and I are married. Married people like to do those things with each other because it feels good. It's not supposed to hurt. But you're not supposed to do it like it happened to you..."

"And to you..."

"Yes, and to me." Otis sighed. "But do you understand?"

"Kinda..."

"Ok..."

"Goodnight...I love you guys."

"Love you too, buddy." Otis called as he shut the door behind him.

"...Did Joshie just walk in on us having sex?"

"Yes. After he had been assaulted."

"Does that make us terrible people?"

"It makes us stupid people for not locking the door."

"You're right..."


	2. Chapter 2

Adi wasn't sure how she had missed Otis getting out of bed; he was usually so coiled around her that if he moved it woke her up.

But as she rolled over and looked at the time on the bedside clock- 2:30- she was distraught that he wasn't beside her.

Usually, if he was awake at this time they had had a fight and he had gone to the woods, or he had awoken from a nightmare and had just begun to work or had gone somewhere to take out his aggression. Or he had gone scouting for a victim.

Stretching, she began to wander the house and look for him. She hated it when he did this. It always worried her what state he would come back in, or what mood he would be in.

Rounding the corner into the living room, she smiled softly at the sight before her.

"It's okay buddy. Shhhh...I know. I know it's scary. But it's not real. It's over." Otis held the little boy close as he wept and trembled, pacing.

"It hurt...it hurt so much..."

"I know. I know exactly how it feels..."

"It STILL hurts!"

"It will for a while. But it'll stop. I promise." He stroked Joshie's hair and kissed his head. "Did you get checked out by the doctor?"

Another shaking sob. "Yeah..."

"What did he say?"

His sobs redoubled and he clenched Otis tighter, squeezing him. Otis cringed slightly at the little fingers digging into his skin.

"H-He...hurt m-me too! He s...stuck his finger...a-and...It r-really...hurt...And th...then he looked at my...my..."

"Shhhhh...Calm down...Shhh..."

"I'm sorry..."

"You don't have to be sorry. Especially not with me, okay?"

"I love you uncle Otis..."

"I love you too, Josh."

Sitting up from Otis's embrace, he wiped his eyes.

"Aw, look at you." Otis wiped his tears gently with this thumb. "It'll be alright. You'll be okay."

"Why do you still get scared?"

"Uh...I...Uh..."

Adi almost stepped in, but Otis provided an answer.

"It was a little different for me. It...Was from the time I was 7 until I was 13."

"Every day?"

"Just about."

Tears began to roll down his face again.

"Hey, hey. What's wrong?"

"You had to do that every day? For that long?!"

"Hey, shhh. Don't cry for me, buddy. Okay? I'm alright. Just worry about you. Alright?"

He whimpered, wiping his tears. Pausing a moment, he leaned in and kissed Otis's cheek.

"Awww. Thank you."

Once Joshie had settled on Otis's shoulder again, Otis continued to pace and stroke his back.

"Baby?" Adi finally stepped out from the shadows.

"Hey, mama."

"He have a nightmare?"

Otis nodded. "Yeah...I heard him whimpering and fussing. And then I heard him jerk awake and gasp and I guess he just curled up into himself and started crying, so I went over and got him."

"How did you HEAR him?"

"Light sleeper."

"Yeah, because you WERE asleep..."

"Mm-hm."

"Unless you woke up from a nightmare, too."

"You would've heard me. You know that."

"Yeah, that's true..."

"How long have you been down here?"

"I saw the whole thing." She smiled. "I love you so much...You're so sweet. I just...Sometimes I can't believe you're mine."

He scoffed. "Lucky you."

"Yes. Lucky me." She kissed him lightly, pulling away to check on Joshie. "Aww..."

"He asleep?"

"Yeah."

"Ok. I'll take him back up to bed, then."

They climbed the stairs together, Adi following Otis into the bedroom where Joshie slept and watching him tuck the small child back into bed.

"It makes you wonder, doesn't it?" She whispered.

"Hm?" He turned to her, eyebrows knit in confusion. "Wonder what?"

"What you would have been like as a father."

He shook his head. "No. No I never wanted that."

"You would be a good father..."

Otis shook his head. "Too much of a temper. Too many problems."

"You don't give yourself enough credit."

He shrugged. "Maybe. But I don't think it's a good idea, regardless."

"I can't have kids, Otis, you know that."

"Yeah..."

They wandered back into their own bedroom, Otis wrapping himself around her as they slept.

When she awoke the next morning, she saw a tiny figure in the doorway, nervously shifting back and forth.

"Hey, sweetheart." Adi cooed.

Otis whimpered in his sleep in reply.

"No, not you." She giggled. "What's the matter, buddy?"

"Is Uncle Otis awake?" He asked sheepishly.

"No, not yet sweetie."

"Ok...I wanted to apologize for waking him up..."

"Oh, no no no. You know you don't have to do that; you know he wasn't mad."

"Ok..." He shifted back and forth a few more times.

"What's wrong, sweetie?"

"Can I cuddle with you guys?"

Smiling widely, Adi flipped up her blanket, allowing Joshie to climb into the bed with them, curling up to her. "There. All snuggly and warm?"

"Mm-hm..." He smiled up at Adi, genuine light touching his eyes. "I love you guys."

"We love you too, sweetie."

It wasn't long until Otis started fussing in her ear. "N...Nn..."

"Baby, shhh...Come on. It's okay."

"Mommy...No..."

"Shh...Otis..."

Joshie stared, wide eyed.

"Honey..."

"No...Mommy please...don't let Daddy do it again...Please..." He buried his nose in her back and screamed, finally waking himself up.

"Otis...Otis calm down. Relax."

"FUCK!"

"Hey, shhhh...We have a visitor..."

"What?"

"Joshie came to cuddle with us this morning."

"Oh...Hey, buddy."

Joshie climbed over Adi, snuggling into Otis's arm as Adi settled in his other.

Otis sighed contentedly as he shifted. "Mm...My two favorite people."

Joshie smiled hugely up at him as Adi kissed his shoulder.


	3. Chapter 3

The day went on well, Joshie attached to Otis's hip as he always was, but with more desperation and fear in his eyes.

Otis had decided to take Joshie to the local park, working on the idea that playing him out would help him sleep at night.

"Uncle Otis?" He murmured from the back seat of the car. Otis made eye contact in the rear-view mirror.

"Yeah?"

"How can you be okay most of the time...?"

Otis sighed. "Well...It's been a long, long time for me, buddy. And...Honestly, you're so much better off than I ever was. You have people that love you and are trying to help you get better. I never had that. I had to fight it on my own. And I was scared for a long, long time. BECAUSE I didn't have anyone. It took longer for me to heal. It's going to take time. What happened was terrible. But you'll get better. And you won't even know it. Just...One day you'll wake up and everything will be okay again."

"...You promise?"

He chuckled. "I promise."

"Okay..." He paused for a moment. "Why don't you tell anyone about what happened to you?"

"I do. I talk to Adi. She knows. Gramma Firefly does, too. Just not everything."

"Why?"

"Well...You don't HAVE to tell anyone you don't want to tell. There are some things that..." He paused, trying to word his statement in a way Joshie could understand. He wanted to provide an answer, not just 'it's different' but he couldn't find a way.

"Does Adi know everything that happened to you?"

"Mm-hm. Everything that I can remember."

"Is it because she's your wife?"

He internally sighed in relief. "Yeah, buddy. Because she's my wife and I love her more than anything in this world."

"Ok. I understand."

They romped and played in the park until more children came and Joshie suddenly became shy, clinging to Otis's leg and refusing to play anymore.

"What's wrong, buddy?"

He began to tremble, tearing up and looking into Otis's eyes desperately. "The other kids...Th...They laughed at me..."

"What?"

"They...They saw w...when..." He gulped. "When it was happening and they laughed at me..."

"You know that's not...That's not...They don't understand..."

He nodded. "Mommy explained it to me. But it still hurts."

"Ok. Come on, then."

Driving home, Otis checked the back seat until Joshie nodded off. Adi met him at the door, holding her arms out for the sleeping little boy in his arms.

"Hey, mama I gotta go get some groceries, you gonna be alright with him?"

"Of course. I'll miss you." She smirked, pecking him quickly on the lips before he left.

When he returned to the Firefly ranch, he was met with Joshie's embrace as soon as he walked through the door.

"Uncle Otis! You missed him!"

"Missed who?" He asked as he greeted Adi with a kiss.

"Spaulding was just here." She chuckled lightly. "Said he would be back in about an hour."

What little color Otis had in his face drained. "What?"

"Yeah! He said he would be back to play with me!"

"That fucker..."

"Otis!" Adi dnapped.

He crouched in front of Joshie, taking his tiny hands in his long, slender ones. "Did he touch you?"

"He...He gave me a hug..."

"You know what I mean, Joshua."

He flinched at the use of his full name, lowering his head. "N...No...Are you mad at me, Uncle Otis?"

"No, of course not." He pulled the child into an embrace, then stood.

"Otis, he was just being nice."

"He's never nice without a motive." He growled. "I would know."

"That was years ago and he was drunk and so were you."

Otis's lip curled, but Adi placed a hand over his mouth before he could explode.

"You know what I mean. You know I'm not blaming you. Calm down."

Otis boiled until he heard the door open, and Joshie excitedly run to it.

"Hey, kid!"

"Don't touch him." He snarled, stepping in between Spaulding and Joshie.

"Whitey, what the hell-"

"Joshie. Go up to my room and play. I'll be up."

"But-"

"GO."

He waited until he heard his door slam, and then resumed. "What the fuck are you doing here?"

"I came to see the kid."

"Yeah, what're you gonna do to him?"

"What? I know he was hurt, I just-"

"What are you gonna make it worse? You don't fucking understand what it's like."

"I wasn't going to hurt him, Otis. I know what happened."

"Fuckin' hurt him just like you did me? I'll kill you if you touch him."

"Otis-"

"Bet you fuckin' raped Baby, too, you sick son of a bi-"

Spaulding slammed Otis into the wall with a gutteral cry. "DON'T YOU DARE."

"What would've stopped you?! You can't contain yourself, remember?!"

"You mother fucker." Spaulding growled low. Otis's eyes widened. If Spaulding was yelling, that was one thing, but when he lowered his voice, Otis knew that it was dangerous. "I love her more than anything in this world. How could you even think that I would do that to her." He released his grip on Otis, simply towering over him instead, inches from his face.

Otis shoved him away, only angering him more. Spaulding punched Otis, making solid contact with his face and hearing bone crunch underneath his fist. Blood started pouring from Otis's nose before he even pulled his hand away, and he slammed him against the wall again, asserting his dominance.

"There, you miserable cock sucker. Just because your parents fucked you and didn't love you doesn't mean they're all the same, you piece of shit. I've apologized to you and apologized to you. I regret what I did. But you're too fucking stuck on yourself to forgive me. Because your Daddy stuck his dick in you? Is that why?"

Shaking with rage, Otis glared at Cutter, who had him in a firm enough grip that he was restrained.

"Yeah. You get all pissy. For what? You ain't gonna do nothin'." He released Otis, who immediately roared to life, throwing Cutter to the ground.

The two rolled around on the floor, pounding each other to a pulp until Adi pulled Otis away, wrenching him upright.

"YOU! GO UPSTAIRS NOW!"

"Adi-"

"NOW!"

Cutter growled, reaching for Otis's shirt. Adi slapped his hand away.

"And YOU!" She pointed to the door. "Get the FUCK out!"

"This isn't your house!"

"I SAID GET THE FUCK OUT!" Her chest heaved with breath, and Otis began to climb the stairs before her anger was redirected at him. "You can come back when you can fucking behave."

"Tell your man the same thing!"

"Maybe if you hadn't fucking raped him he wouldn't be suspicious of letting you around another victim. GO!"

Otis heard the door slam as Cutter left. Sighing, he sat down on the bed beside Joshie. Blood dropped onto the floor at his feet and he groaned.

"Shit...Won't stop bleedin'..."

"Here uncle Otis." Joshie quickly wadded some toilet paper and held it gently to Otis's face, moving with him as he flinched. "Don't be scared uncle Otis. You know I won't hurt you."

"Yeah, I know kid. I know."

"Does it hurt?"

"A little. I'll be alright."

"...Captain Spaulding did that to you, too?"

Otis sighed. "Ah...Well..."

Joshie planted a kiss on Otis's head, still firmly holding the toilet paper to his face. "It's okay uncle Otis." As blood soaked through the paper, he grimaced. "Uh-oh."

"It's alright. Just go get some more. You can play doctor like aunt Adi."

"I think Aunt Adi is mad at you..."

"Oh she's pissed."


	4. Chapter 4

"Otis...I understand. But that doesn't mean I'm not pissed off."

"Adi, come on-"

"You are NOT getting laid tonight."

"I was just trying to protect Joshie from what happened to me."

"Otis, he's not going to rape Joshie! He did that to you, yes. But he's not going to do that to Joshie. That was an isolated incident. He'd never done it before, and he hasn't done it since."

"Are you DEFENDING him?!"

"No, goddammit Otis! You're smart enough to know that I'm not. You're just pissed off."

"Yeah, I am-"

"Or are you jealous?"

"What?"

"You're jealous that Joshie likes Cutter and you're worried he'll replace you."

"...Well I wasn't until you brought it up!"

"Oh for Christ sake Otis. God I could just...STRANGLE you when you're like this!"

"Well why don't ya, huh? YOu wouldn't be the fuckin' first one! Come on, hit me! Fuckin HIT ME, Adi!"

"Otis. You need to calm down."

"You don't FUCKING know what it's like!"

"You're right. I don't. I never said I did."

"Why the FUCK are you so calm?! Fucking...CHRIST!"

"Hey. Hey, listen." She placed a gentle hand on either of his arms, holding him in place. "Calm down. You're getting worked up over nothing."

"Nothing?! Adi he just fucking PUNCHED me!"

"Shhhhh..." She caressed his cheek, tucking a strand of hair behind his ear. He scowled back at her, frustrated at her demeanor in contrast to his. "I know. But we can't talk about this when you're worked up like this. Come on, baby."

Otis let out a small whimper. Goddamn, sometimes he hated the effect she had on him.

She stood on her tiptoes and placed a light kiss on his lips. "Okay. Talk to me. Without yelling."

"I don't want the same thing to happen to him that did to me."

"I understand. But he never did it to Baby, or Rufus, or Tiny. He was on drugs. He's not now. He just wants to make Joshie happy, Otis. Just like you do."

"But..."

"Otis, there was a time you trusted him enough to take you in. There was a time where you two were inseparable. Haven't you ever missed that?"

"Why do you think it hurt so much." He demanded, turning away.

"Honey..."

"It wasn't just what he did. That would have been enough. But it was the trust I put in him that he broke. He was the first person I ever told about what happened to me. He was the first person I ever felt safe with. And I lo-..."

"You loved him..."

Glaring, Otis glanced at Adi then back at the floor. "He was something I never had. The father I always wanted when I asked for anything as a kid. And he just...spun it all around and was just another regret..."

"You miss him..."

Shoving his hands in his pockets, Otis scowled at her again. But his face softened quickly as he sighed.

She took his face in her hands, kissing him gently. "Thank you."

He grunted, shrugging.

"Come on, let's go to bed. You're still not getting any."

"You still love me?"

"Of course I do, idiot."

That night, Joshie heard a terrible shriek from Otis and Adi's room. Terrified, he cowered under the covers, whimpering as he drew the blanket over his shoulders.

"Otis...Otis shhhhh..." He heard Adi coo.

Another howl in the night. This time, he recognized the voice.

Slowly, he crept down the hallway to investigate, desperately trying to alert Adi. He popped the door open just a crack, then slowly opened it.

Otis cowered in the corner of their bed, shaking and sobbing.

"Honey, it's okay. It's okay."

"NO! STOP! STOP HITTING ME PLEASE!"

"Honey, wake up...Otis it's just a dream..."

"John NO! PLEASE STOP!"

Adi reeled for a moment. She had never heard him mention Cutter in one of his nightmares. "Baby, come on please wake up."

He sobbed, begging desperately. "Please...John...Please stop...NO! NO DON'T LET DADDY COME IN HERE! NO!"

Joshie stepped into the room, knowing Adi was distracted.

"Honey...Come on baby...Come on...Come back to me..."

A sound that Adi had never heard out of Otis filled the room- a plea with more fear and desperation than she had ever heard as he clawed at imaginary hands, scratching himself in the process. Adi grabbed his wrists, restraining him, earning her another pitiful shriek.

"OTIS WAKE UP!" She shook him, wracking his head off of the wall. She cringed, but sighed in relief when he opened his eyes and startled away from her, forcing her to release her grip. "Hey...Come on, come here."

"Nn!" He flinched further into himself as she approached him. Curled into a ball, sobbing, arms hiding his face, her heart shattered.

Tears rolled down Joshie's face as he watched the scene.

"Baby, come on. It's okay."

"I'm sorry...I'm sorry..."

"You don't have anything to be sorry about. Come on...Let me see you..."

"NO..."

"Is it one of those nights where you just hurt?" She asked, lightly stroking his back, ignoring his flinch.

He nodded, whimpering and fisting his hair at the roots.

"Hey, come on. Don't hurt yourself. Don't do that, baby." She took his hand, gently kissing his knuckles. "Don't hurt yourself..."

"I hate this..."

"I know, baby. I know."

"I'm sorry."

"Stop apologizing. You have nothing to be sorry about."

"I'm sorry I'm so fucked up..."

"Baby, you're not. Stop saying that. You're my sweetheart. I love you." She tried to stroke his face, but he flinched once again. "Shhhh...Did seeing Cutter today make it worse?"

He nodded.

"Brought back a lot you haven't thought about in a while, huh?"

He nodded once again.

"It's okay, honey. Do you want something for your aches?"

"No...Doesn't help...It's all in my head..." He entwined his fingers in his hair, wrenching at the roots once more and cringing.

"Hey, stop that. Stop hurting yourself. Why are you doing that?"

"I fucking hate myself so much..."

"That's senseless...Why are you saying that?"

"Because... I s..still have these terrors..." He sobbed. "How can I expect to help Joshie when I can't fucking help myself?"

"Hon, the only reason you still have problems is because you never had the chance to get help. Joshie does. You're just giving him what you wish you had had. You're not weak. You just didn't have the opportunity to fix it...You aren't broken. You're not weak. You're not disgusting. So stop hating yourself for some thing that's not your fault."

"B-But-"

"Otis." She swiped his arm away from his head. "And stop pulling your hair."

Joshie smiled slightly, happy his uncle had found someone to treat him this well.

"Okay?" She kissed him, stroking gently down his back. "I love you. I love you so much."

"I love you too, mama..."

"Now go back to sleep, okay?"

"I'm gonna sleep on the couch. I hurt too bad..."

"I can-"

"No...Just...I'm fine..." He hobbled to the door and Joshie hurried down the hallway, afraid of embarrassing his uncle.

When Adi came downstairs that morning, Joshie was curled into Otis's side, arms wrapped around him protectively as they both snored.


	5. Chapter 5

"How long have you been down here, sweetheart?" Adi asked, stroking Joshie's hair out of his face.

"Since Uncle Otis came down. I waited until he fell asleep."

"And he didn't wake up?"

"No."

Cocking her head, worried, Adi gently stroked Otis's face. "Sweetheart?"

He startled, whimpering. "What..?"

"Are you alright?"

"Yeah...I'm ok- when the hell did you get here?" He asked, lifting his arm and peering down at Joshie.

"Since you came down."

"I can't believe he didn't wake you up."

"I can't either..."

"I was extra quiet uncle Otis."

"No, buddy no that usually...Ah, well."

"Uncle Otis, are you okay?"

"Yeah, kiddo, I'm fine. I'm sure you heard me last night..."

Joshie bashfully nodded.

"I'm sorry if I scared you or woke you up."

"No, Uncle Otis, don't be sorry." He squeezed Otis's waist. "I love you."

"I love you too, buddy."

"Captain Spaulding and I are going fishing today!"

"W...What?"

"We're going fishing. He said he'd take me when he went."

Otis cleared his throat. "Oh. You just...Be careful, you hear? Don't...Let him do..."

"I know now, Uncle Otis."

When Cutter came to pick Joshie up, Otis stayed in his room, working on a statue.

When Joshie excitedly chattered about their adventure, Adi noticed a marked sadness in Otis's face. He tried to mask it, but she knew.

The next day, Cutter came to pick Joshie up to help him fiddle with his car, Otis seemed withdrawn.

"Sweetie...?" Adi murmured, placing a hand on his shoulder.

"What."

"You...You okay?"

"Mmhm. Fine."

"What's going on in that head of yours?"

"Adi..."

"Come on, babe."

"I..." He sighed. "Those are all the things he promised to take me to do...Once I got better."

"Oh..."

"He promised me to take me fishin'...How to fix cars...Promised me to give me somethin' to live for. Somethin' to look forward to." He cleared his throat. "I remember layin' in that bed, strugglin' to breathe and him tellin' me he's gonna be the Daddy I deserved. I got scared as hell. Wonderin' what he meant. He told me he was gonna take me fishing. Hunting, in the winter. Told me I had to eat and take care of myself. Had to get better. So that we could go together."

"Hon..."

"Just stings. Like a slap in the face. I'm fine. I've survived much worse."

"You're worried Joshie will replace you."

"Kid'll do what he wants." Otis shrugged. "I did what I could."

Regardless of his current emotions, there was no mistaking Otis's smile when Joshie curled up to him after he returned, watching TV from his position against his Uncle's chest.

"Uncle Otis?"

"Hm?"

"I want you and Captain Spaulding to get along again..."

"Buddy-"

"He said he really misses you...I think he means it. He said he's sorry."

"Joshie..." Otis rubbed his face in frustration.

"I want to do something with you two together. Please? Please?"

"No."

"Uncle Otis, please...I want to so bad...I want to spend time with both of you..."

Otis groaned. "Fine. Fine."

"Tomorrow we're gonna make crafts. I bet you'd like it! You're always making cool stuff."

"Alright. Alright."

Cutter was shocked when Otis knocked on his door with Joshie beside him.

"Hey."

"Hey, Otis...I...I didn't think you'd come..."

"Yeah, well, here I am."

"Thank you."

They set up Joshie with crafts and sat down at Cutter's kitchen table, a mug of coffee in each man's hands.

"I wish...So desperately I could undo that night. But I know I can't. I know I just made things a whole lot worse for you. And I know I hurt you more than you'd ever admit."

Otis remained silent, peering into his mug.

"But I miss you. I miss you being around the shop and coming in just to visit or hang out. I know you'll never do that again. You're not one to make the same mistake twice. But...Can I prove to you that you didn't make a mistake by trusting me?"

"I know I didn't make a mistake trusting you. I ended up with a family. A roof over my head and some sort of security for the first time in my life. But I did make a mistake in leaving myself vulnerable to you."

"But you didn't. I made the mistake. I didn't hurt you when you were sick, did I? I didn't hurt you any other time. I just...I was so high and so drunk that I didn't know what I was doing before I did it. And I know that doesn't change anything. But...I had no intentions of ever hurting you."

Otis made eye contact for the first time, gauging Cutter's honesty.

"I'm sorry, Otis. I'm so sorry. You trusted me and I threw it away. Please, let me earn that back. Please."

"Why do you care?"

"Because I miss you. I miss the son I had."

Nodding, Otis returned his gaze to his mug.

"Think you can give me another chance?"

"It's...Gonna be a while, old man...But I'll...I'll...Start workin' on it if you will."

"I will."

"And stop fuckin' callin' me whitey."

He laughed outright. "Not a chance."

"Uncle Otis?" Joshie looked at him, eyes wide with glee. "Look at what I made!"

"Wow, buddy! Great job!"

"Am I an artist like you?"

"Sure are bud. Sure are."

"Are you guys friends again?"

"We're...working on it." Otis admitted.

"It's going to be a while for us, little man. But we're gonna be good."

"Yay! So I can hang out with both of you now!"

"Not all the time. I'm sure Uncle Otis wants some time with just you just like I do."

"Yeah, but we can all do fun stuff together!"

"We can." Otis nodded.

"I'd still like to take you fishing..." Cutter admitted. "And teach you how to-"

"Taught myself how to work on cars. Don't need you teachin'."

"Well, maybe you can teach me then. I'm always up for learning some more."

"Maybe I can..." Otis sighed and nodded, releasing some residual tension. "Maybe I can..."


	6. Chapter 6

"Alright, buddy. We'd better get goin'. It's about dinner time and Adi will skin me if I'm not back in time."

"Okay, Uncle Otis." Joshie neatly put away his crafts and cleaned his area, smiling ear to ear at his creations.

"Hah. Surely didn't get his cleaning habits from you." Spaulding chided, his smile fading as he saw Otis's deathly glare. "...Sorry..."

Otis snorted in response.

"Uncle Otis?"

"Yeah?"

"I love you!" He turned to Otis, beaming.

Otis chuckled. "I love you too, buddy. Now come on, let's get goin'. I hear your belly rumbling over here."

"Okay. Bye Captain Spaulding!" He squeezed the clown as tightly as he could.

"Bye, kiddo." He returned the embrace, then standing and reaching for Otis, only landing a hand on his shoulder before the albino jerked away, alarmed. "Come on, Otis. Give me a hug."

Otis shook his head.

"Otis..."

"Don't touch me."

"But..."

"It's gonna take more time for me to let you touch me again. I just...Let it happen, alright? I hate to admit it, but I'm like a stray cat. Come at me too quick and I'm gone."

The clown snorted. "You're our stray cat, Otis."

He couldn't help but chuckle. "Yeah, I guess that was more accurate than I thought about." He took Joshie by the hand, leading him out the door.

"Hey, Otis?"

"Yeah? Hey, I'll have that sculpture in tom-"

"I'm really proud of you."

He froze, facial expression blank. "W...What?"

"I'm really proud of you, I said. You've overcome a whole lot. And you're still standing. And I know I've only added to that, but you're willing to work on it for me. And I'm proud of you for having the strength to do that. I don't know that I would."

"I-I...W..." He stammered for a moment, then shook his head, clearing his mind. "Uh...W...We uh...We better...Yeah. Mm-hm."

He took Joshie's hand, leading him to the car.

As soon as the child walked through the door, he called for Adi. "Aunt Adi! Something's wrong with Uncle Otis!"

"What? What happened?!" She asked, rushing into the room.

"I dunno. Captain Spaulding told him he was proud of him and he hasn't been right since."

She chuckled, her panic dying down. "Sweetheart? How did that go?" She kissed Otis in greeting, stroking his hair behind his ear. "You alright?"

"Yeah...Uh...It was g...good...Uhm..."

"Why did that catch you so off guard?"

"It's...ah...It's an explanation that is not...uhm..."

"Okay. Another time."

"Yeah. Later."

"You're not getting laid tonight until you tell me."

As they all sat in the living room that night, enjoying the evening programs, Joshie carefully watched his Aunt and Uncle interact.

The two needed no words exchanged with each other, it seemed. Adi began to doze off, slumping against Otis, who gently prodded at her side. She took this as her cue to curl up in his lap like a cat, resting her head on his chest. He gently stroked her arm, kissing her head and murmuring into her ear. She looked up at him, elliciting a soft smile and giving him a kiss before settling again.

Otis caught Joshie's eyes and pat the couch beside him. The little boy happily crawled up beside them, curling into Otis's side.

"Hey! I wanna cuddle Uncle Otis too!" Baby chimed in, squeezing Joshie against Otis and curling up into all of them.

"Augh! Baby!" Otis protested as he was smothered.

Joshie giggled hysterically. How could he be sad when he was surrounded by so much love?

They sat like that for a while, until Baby got bored and moved on. Joshie and Adi stayed, curled up to the albino.

Adi tilted her head back, kissing Otis's jaw three times. He smiled down at her once again, kissing her nose three times.

"Why do you do that three times?"

"Means 'I Love You. Get it? 3 words, three kisses or hugs or taps?" Otis explained. "It's our little secret."

"Ohhhhh! I get it!"

"Mm-hm. Sometimes, when you can't say it, you can still tell 'em."

"That's so cool!"

As it drew closer to Joshie's bedtime, Adi and Otis helped him settle into bed, then retired themselves.

"Come here, baby." Adi coaxed, patting the edge of the bed in front of her. He obeyed, a questioning look on his face. As she began to knead the taut muscles of his shoulders, he relaxed into her hands.

"Oh, God that feels good..."

"I knew you'd be all tight and tense from talking to Spaulding today."

"It was fine, honestly..."

"But you were still cautious. What made you so upset when he told you he was proud of you?"

"I wasn't upset...I..." He sighed. "It was just...a lot...At once. I saw-see- him as a father figure. And now that we're trying to be...close again it was a lot...And I've..." He sighed again, grumbling. "Adiiii..."

"No, come on. You're doing good."

"I always wanted my dad to tell me he was proud of me. What little boy doesn't. But I knew I'd never hear that. Ever. But to hear it from him...To hear it from him was pretty damn close...And it just...overwhelmed me."

"Sweetheart..."

"Come on, can I have some lovin' or are you shuttin' me down tonight?"

"Babe, when you look like you do, I have a hard time shutting you down." She pulled him to the bed with her, giggling as he crawled on top of her, beginning to kiss down her body.

He whispered sweet nothings in her ear as he made love to her, making her groan and scream and writhe in pleasure until they were both satisfied. They curled up in each other's arms and slept into the morning, Otis sleeping soundly in the only place he ever had.


	7. Chapter 7

It was too hot in the house to cook that night, mother Firefly decided. So the family entered a small diner in town, Joshie happily trotting along Otis's side.

"Honey, you okay today?" Adi asked, putting her hand on Otis's thigh.

"Mm-hm. I'm good."

Adi knew it would always be a struggle for Otis to eat in public, but he was getting better. Especially with Joshie there.

"What are you going to eat, sweetie?" Joshie's mother asked him.

Suddenly, Joshie had an outburst. Not a terrible, screaming fit, but enough to startle Otis into trembling slightly and to make his mother angry.

"Joshua-"

"No, don't yell at him." Otis interjected. "I'm sorry, I don't mean to tell you how to parent, but...Let me talk to him, okay?"

"Oh, no. I know you probably understand better because..." She fell silent. "Yeah. I'm not upset with you, Otis."

He nodded. "Come on, buddy. Let's take a walk." He picked up the little boy, taking him out of the booth with him, and took him outside.

Adi followed, watching through the restaurant window.

"Hey, buddy it's okay. Look at me."

"I'm sorry Uncle Otis I'm sorry, I'm sorry-"

"Relax. Relax. I'm not upset. Come on." He stroked Joshie's hair. "Calm down. Let's talk this through, okay?"

Tears flowed freely down the boy's face as he looked up at his uncle, crouched in front of him.

"What made you want to act like that? Can you tell me?"

"I...I don't know...I...My heart was beating so fast and I didn't know what to do, and then mommy asked me a question and I don't even know what she asked. But there was a lot of people all at once and I got...I don't know."

"Okay. You got overwhelmed. That's what that feeling is called. It was just too much at one time. And it's okay to feel like that."

"I don't like it..."

"I know buddy. But you know what? I get overwhelmed a lot too. I get really anxious in public sometimes."

"Why?"

"Because a lot of people think I look funny, and it makes me worry about them staring at me. I don't like it. Why do you think you got overwhelmed?"

"I...We haven't really...gone out to eat or anything since..."

"Okay. Why does that scare you?"

"I...I'm afraid people will know. And they'll laugh at me. Like the other kids."

"Sweetheart, he's not here. He's not going to hurt you anymore. I understand though. Even after my parents died, I always thought they were going to come get me. It's not a fun feeling. And it is really scary. But even if he was here, I would kill him before he touched you again."

"How would you know? You don't know what he looks like."

"All you would have to do is tell me. Or...Here, let me show you something." Otis squeezed his hand three times. "Do you know what that means? That's how Adi and I say 'I love you' without having to say words. Because sometimes you can't get them out. So what I want YOU to do, if you see him or if you feel uncomfortable, is I want you to squeeze my hand TWICE if you're just scared, and FOUR times if it's the man who hurt you that you see. Okay?"

"Okay. I can do that."

"Yeah?"

"Mm-hm...That's a really good idea, Uncle Otis!"

He chuckled. "Thanks buddy."

"I'm sorry I scared you..."

"It's okay, Joshie. I'm just jumpy. That's all. I'm not mad at you. I understand what it's like. But you won't feel like this forever. It'll get better."

"My body still hurts..."

"I know. It will for a while, but that'll go away too."

"Why do you still hurt?"

"Because I'm old, buddy." He snorted. "That and...Remember I told you I never got taken care of? Well...that's not good, even after you heal. So I'm glad you got taken care of."

Joshie wrapped his arms around Otis's neck, giving him a kiss on the cheek. "I love you, Uncle Otis..."

"I love you too buddy. A whole lot." He kissed Joshie's head. "Let's go back in and eat. whaddya say?"

"Okay."

"You've gotta be good, though. Okay? No more tantrums. If you feel like you're going to have one, just squeeze my hand twice, remember?"

"Okay..." He hung his head. "I'm sorry."

"It's alright. Come on." He picked him up, giving him a tight hug before they walked back into the restaurant together.

Adi tried to skitter away, but Otis saw her. "Were you spying on us?" He asked, reaching for a kiss.

"Yeah...Sorry."

Otis shrugged. "We just needed a little man to man talk. How about it bud?"

"Yeah! Man stuff!" Joshie giggled.

"Oh! Sorry for intruding then." Adi laughed. When they made it back to the table, she whispered in Otis's ear. "You handled that really, really well. I'm so proud of you."

He smiled back at her. She leaned in once more.

"I also want to fuck you right here on this table in public, with everyone watching."

His face reddened, and he tried to hide it, rubbing his face.

"Tonight." She murmured.

Otis nodded in response.


End file.
